Saturday 17 August 2013

Rule No.29: You're not going to find your Italian husband in Lake Garda

Well, you'll be glad to know it's my last day in Lake Garda.

I'm trying not to get depressed yet, but it's pretty hard when I know that this time tomorrow I'll be on a train back to London. What makes it worse is I know I've got to move everything back into my bedroom when I get home (I had to take everything out for the decorators).

Errrrggggghhhhhhh. 

Anyway, back to Italy...so our night out on Thursday wasn't too successful for pulling fit Italian men. I did get chatting to a lawyer who owned a yacht (sounds perfect?). He had a big belly and was at least 15 years older than me. Therefore, the conversation was more like a polite 10 minute chat. 

It was a really fun night though, we found an outside club right next to the lake. All of the music was in English. They even played a dance version of Bastille - Pompeii. The DJ kept shouting '1,2,3,4'. 

It was a pretty surreal since it was a club for the locals and we were the only English people in there. Handy for us though because we knew the words to every song. I got so excited when Aviici came on I danced around the stage like I was being chased by a gorilla. 

During my week in Italy I have learnt five things: 

1) Don't come to Lake Garda to find an Italian Stallion...it's full of couples and children 
2) The fact we say 'latte' in England is stupid. We're technically just asking for milk and it is very confusing for Italian waiters. It's either cafe latte or latte macchiato 
3) Prosecco is cheaper than beer
4) My name is an Italian grandma name 
5) If someone asks you if you and your housemate are sisters, don't say 'no we just live together' as they then presume you're lesbians 

I would say the most awkward thing that has happened to me while being here is when we were talking about motorbikes at dinner. Heather's mum suddenly said "I bet you like something powerful between your legs don't you Gina". Wow. All I could manage to say was "did that just happen???"

We then laughed hysterically for about twenty minutes. 

Bloody hilarious. 

Anyway, I think Italy is 'me'. I LOVE the food, I love the weather and I love the people. And, with the language you can kinda get away with just putting an 'o' at the end of everythingo.

I am to be referred to as 'Gino' from now on. 

This morning the hotel waiter has been teaching me Italian. He already knows me too well, "Gina, when you meet a good looking Italian man that can't speak much English you say 'qual è il tuo nome?'...'what is your name?'." 

It's a bit late now, but you never know, it might come in handy at the airport. 

I'm off to practice my poi soon before dinner. I did a bit yesterday too: 


That's called angel wings. 


The windmill. 


Big circle weave. 

You need videos really, but my iPhone wont let me upload them :( 

Btw, you'll be excited to know that Heather and I got FOUR shout outs from the pianist last night. A new record! I even got a shout out to the 'New Bridget'...I feel like I have a new secret identity. 

Speak to you when I'm back in Englando!


P.s look at this cute bridge with padlocks from couples (it makes me sick)


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