Rule No.71: Don't get a blow dry on a rainy day

I have been at my parents house in Coventry for nearly two hours now and I've already had two cups of tea and a whole shepherds pie made for me. This is the life. FYI, I didn't eat the whole pie as it was big enough for three people (although I wanted to).

My Dad has already given me the job of wrapping the presents he bought for my mum. It's my yearly task as apparently he can't wrap presents himself... However, I'm pretty sure this is a lie. Just like the time my brother told me 'I was the best at making cups of tea' so that I would feel special and actually want to make them. 

Anyway, a few things have happened in the past 24 hours...

I got my nails done last night and looked like Edward scissor hands. 

But now they look nice. 

I decided to get rid of the festive nails and go for a more grown up look...I am not five years old after all.

This morning Charlotte and I had a blow dry so we would look nice for the Christmas period. This obviously included the usual question from the hairdresser, "so where are your family from originally then? You're obviously not English".

I wonder if people will ever think I look English? I feel like my face just tells a massive lie. I am a walking (usually sitting) LIE. 

We then had a team breakfast, which included poached eggs on toast with maple bacon and avocado. It was heaven. I think I just dribbled again.

It was then time to do some work (bah humbug). However, I was actually quite productive considering it was Christmas Eve. I of course ensured we were listening to some 80s classics to keep us going. Don't hate me, but I'm bored of Christmas songs already...even Michael Buble ones.

After work I had a last minute trip to Fortnum and Mason to do some rather late Christmas present shopping. This basically included me pushing tourists out of the way whilst getting two items that I had pre planned to buy. I knew exactly where they were so I felt like I was doing some kind of game show challenge to get to them without physically pushing anyone over (or punching them). Luckily I survived. Oh, and the tourists survived too.

As I left the office to go to Euston station it started to bloody rain. Therefore, my blow dry was ruined. What a waste! At least my hair is now extra clean...

More annoyingly, I had so much stuff to take home I looked and felt like a sweaty donkey. 

I was supposed to be pulling a miserable face in this picture, but I actually look like I'm doing a Paris Hilton pout.

The photo doesn't really do the 'donkey look' much justice. However, I also had a bag on my back and my suitcase weighed more than me... The price I pay to give my family presents at Christmas (and most importantly bring enough clothes back so I have numerous outfits to choose from each day). 

I'm shortly going to the City Arms in Coventry. It's a yearly tradition to meet at the pub and I can't wait to see everyone (and drink). Although, I'm only going to stay out until midnight. The nights of going to the Colosseum (a Coventry club) after the City Arms and getting a kebab at 3am are over. You can never appreciate your Christmas dinner when you have a hangover and you're still full from a morning kebab...

I hope Santa visits you tonight chums. I know he's not visiting me until Boxing day, but you know, I'm not selfish so I hope you get lots of presents. Then you can hopefully share them with me. Thanks. 

X 

Rule No.56: Don't chat to a guy outside the door to the toilets

I am currently watching Grease, eating Phad Thai and loving life.

I shouldn't be though, I got home at 9am this morning after staying up all night at a house party. Since when did my life become an episode of Skins? (well, not quite).

Hayley, Aimee and I decided to have a girlie night out, which started at the Hoxton Bar and Grill in Shoreditch. However, when the lights came on a 2am we didn't want to go home so we went to the Dolphin in Hackney. This is where we met some Brazilian men who invited us to a house party and we had a bit of a 'YOLO' moment. We left the Dolphin at 5am and went to the house party, we drank Brazilian alcohol, learnt to dance the samba and I did a poi show using socks. It wasn't until 8am that we decided we should probably go home and sleep.

Before the night began:

Our stamps from the Dolphin:

Some of our new Brazilian friends:

Luckily I was drinking water from 7am so I feel fine today! I also slept until 3pm... I genuinely think we've made some new friends, we've even been invited to stay with them in Rio during the world cup (not that this will actually happen). I've also exchanged numbers with a guy called Pedro. You know how much I like a foreign man...

In other news, I HAVE MICE. Not the cute kind in a glass cage either, the unwanted kind that wees and poos all over your house.

I have slept on the sofa since Tuesday after discovering mouse poo next to my pillow. I saw it, looked at it and exclaimed "ARE YOU F*CKING JOKING". I nearly cried. This was the first time I realised I had mice. However, I've put three mouse traps down and nothing has happened, I haven't seen or heard anything these past few days either. Therefore, I'm going to pick up the courage to sleep in my own bed tonight. Don't worry I've washed my bed sheets!

Just to clear things up...my house is very clean. Unfortunately, having mice in London is extremely common.

Anyway, as I haven't blogged for a while I thought I'd create a list of my weekly highlights and low lights.

Highlights:
1) I went to see Foxes play at the Google HQ. She's really good! The Google offices made me green with envy though, there's also a lot of good looking men there. I'm starting to think that I should start hanging around outside the offices
2) My friend Christian and I went to the photography exhibition at the Natural History Museum. It was so GOOD!!
3) I ate an amazing cupcake
4) My friend Hayley bought me a beautiful bracelet as a belated birthday present
5) I didn't burn myself in my fire poi class on Monday
6) I've consumed a lot of Baileys

Low lights:
1) Discovering mice, OBVIOUSLY
2) Getting screamed at on the tube by a guy wearing a scary clown mask (he was trying to scare me)
3) Being freaked out when stopped and asked to take a photograph for a skeleton on Oxford Street (Halloween outfit)
4) Sleeping on the sofa
5) Chatting to a guy on Thursday night while I was waiting for the toilet and my friend shouting 'Gina don't make it smell in there'

Overall, this week has been pretty good.

Good night people. x

Rule No.37: Don't pretend you can speak a foreign language

After watching Bridget Jones's Diary, Bridget Jones - The Edge of Reason, Dream Girls and X Factor, and after eating a bacon sandwich, cookies, pasta and Doritos, I finally felt less hungover yesterday.

It was a really good night on Saturday and it was great seeing the uni girls. After the house party (and a lot of gin) we went to The Dolphin in Hackney. I decided that I wanted to be everyone's best friend so I was chatting to EVERYONE and anyone. I got chatting to two guys (both reasonably good looking), one guy was German so I decided to tell him that I speak fluent German. Even though I can hardly speak any... He of course began talking to me in German.

I didn't have a clue.

I just said 'Mein name ist Gina' to at least prove I know a tiny bit.

I then had to embarrassingly admit I was slightly exaggerating when I had said 'fluent'. He laughed, luckily. But, I looked like a right idiot.

I was actually quite proud of myself yesterday, even though I was ridiculously hungover I still managed to do two lots of washing and I even made my friend Sarah a good luck card. She's moving to Bolivia tomorrow, the crazy cat.

I'm so artistic. 

However, on to today...for a Monday morning it has actually been OK. Apart from the DISGUSTING Brazil nut I ate an hour ago. It tasted like mould and the taste was so strong it was making me gag (sorry). I was sitting at my desk so I couldn't just spit it out either. It felt like I was doing a bush tucker trial, I kept chewing really quickly and grabbed my glass of water to help wash it down. It was really really vile, and as you know I'm not very fussy with food. Nevertheless, you'll be glad to know I passed the trial, and I had a Reece's peanut butter cup as a reward (then I had three more).

I'm going to leave you with a video of my hula hoop practise. I am terrible, I move like a hippo.

P.S. I have my first three hour fire poi choreography lesson tonight. Although, I don't trust myself playing with fire for three hours...I've already come to terms with the fact I probably won't have any eyebrows left tomorrow. I've also warned my date that I maybe bald on Thursday.

x

Rule No.35: Don't just blurt out whatever you're thinking

It's friiiiidaaaaaaay!!! 

I celebrated this morning with a chocolate croissant.

My Scandinavian diet is still on hold and I'm temporarily on the French diet.

It was my turn to finish work early today so I've come straight home (well I also bought a new top and skirt from Monki on the way) to clean my house. WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME? I should be drunk by now. 

Say that, I think I had enough wine last night. 

I went to a work quiz night. Free alcohol meant I'd already had three glasses of wine before the quiz even started. I was chatting to two directors after my third glass, and I don't know why but I was coming out with the most ridiculous things. The first thing I said to one director was 'wow, you're tall'. Luckily they both laughed. Then even more awkwardly I said to the other 'nice holiday bracelet', only to find out it's actually really expensive. (I'm terrible with jewellery...just give me something from Topshop and I'm happy). 

I genuinely thought the bracelet was something like mine...

Then the food came out. We had two platters between three of us, which meant I consumed at least 15 mini sausages (that sounds dodgy), two mini burgers and a bowl of wedges.

I then came home to find both of my housemates still out. I didn't have a key as Jade accidentally took it back to Coventry on Tuesday, so I sat on my porch for half an hour listening to my iPod. I listened to 'Rudimental - Feel The Love' for the whole 30minutes. Not sure why, but I get really obsessed with songs sometimes. Like the time I listened to 'Union J - Carry You' on repeat to and from work for a whole week. I must have listened to it over 100 times.

Tonight I'm going on the Jack the Ripper tour. I'm pretty scared as it's meant to be very frightening and I get scared pretty easily. I'll probably end up having to hold someones hand. Preferably not a strangers (unless he's fit). 

I'm going with my friends from uni as Sarah is moving to Bolivia next month. Therefore, this weekend we're going to make sure she has an amazing time. Obviously Saturday night is going to involve a lot of alcohol. 

Last time we all got together we decided what animals we would be...

Suze = penguin

Hayley = peacock 

Aimee = fluffy cat 

Sophie = horse 

Sarah = gazelle 

Emma = poodle 

Gina = lion 

I'm quite glad I'm a lion. It's mainly because of my hair, I wouldn't say I roar that much. 

Right I'm going to clean my house before I get my nappy on ready for tonight (just in case I sh*t myself).

x

Rule No.28: Don't go on a boat with a hangover

You are going to LOVE what happened to me last night. 

To give you the background story...on Tuesday night Heather and I got chatting to the pianist, and I gave him the link to my blog. We were also discussing our favourite songs, where mine has always been Tracy Chapman - Fast Car. 

Last night after dinner Heather and I went to go and watch the pianist (as we are his groupies). After a few songs he said "my next song is from a movie from Great Britain, based on the most beautiful girl on the island...Bridget Jones". 

!!!!!!

THEN he played Tracy Chapman - Fast Car..."this is for Gina". 

!!!!!

Of course (with a slightly red face) I sang my heart out to Tracy. A German woman sitting opposite to me was also singing along. She then started singing along whilst looking at me and awkwardly we sang together. It was a special moment...well it felt special after a bottle of Prosecco. 

We then sang Take That together. 

Oh god, I'm dreading bumping into her. 

CRINGE.

This morning (after my daily croissant with nutella) we had a boat ride across the lake to Limone. Oh dear. The boat was so crowded we were like sardines, and I got split up from Heather. 

I was having to stop myself being sick for a whole hour. It was TERRIBLE. Boats and hangovers are not a great combination. 

However, Limone is a beautiful place so I soon felt happy again. It's also famous for making Limoncello, so I obviously bought a big bottle. 

It's probably not big enough to be honest. 

Look at my pretty photos:

We're out partying tonight so wish me some Italian men hunting luck. 

X 

Rule No.15: There could be a reason why you're single...

Sorry for the delayed post. I was at my friends BBQ all day yesterday and then I went straight out with a couple of the girls in the evening, and I've only just started to feel human enough to type. The closest I'm going to get to leaving the house today is opening the window (with clothes on).

The BBQ was really fun yesterday. My friend's parents house is absolutely incredible, so it is now my aim in life to become rich enough to have a pool and a tennis court in my garden. Even if I don't use either. They would just look nice. Therefore, I need to find a rich man as I currently can't even afford a garden in London.

Isn't this just amazing (ignoring the grey sky):

As I'm sure you've already guessed, the diet isn't going well. Yesterday I consumed a sausage roll for breakfast (I was in a rush and didn't know what to buy), a burger at the BBQ, some potato salad and half a bowl of noodles. If you hadn't noticed, it was just carbs.  This is very disappointing, especially as I actually love fruit and vege. I just always seems to pick carbs over it. However, when I was a child my grandma used to call me her 'little fruit bat' because I was always eating fruit. Now the only thing she could probably call me is her 'big carb cow'...I'm sure she actually wouldn't as I can't imagine she would ever be that mean, but you get my point.

Last night whilst Abi, Aimee and I were having a couple of G&Ts at mine, Aimee raised a good point. She has noticed recently that we're not very ladylike and that could be a turn off for men. I have to agree with her. Therefore, I thought it was only right that she made a demonstration video for you all. Please bear in mind that the impression of us going out has been a little exaggerated, well I bloody hope so anyway. Please also ignore my messy lounge.

I hope you noticed Aimee's odd socks. And yes, that is my real laugh.

It was then a little concerning when we went out, we got to our first bar and I ordered a bottle of wine for the three of us. The barmaid just gave us the bottle without any glasses. Is it possible that we look so unladylike that she thought we were just going to use straws or swig from the bottle? Obviously, following Aimee's rule, we asked for some wine glasses and sat like ladies.

I didn't do too badly when we were out last night, whilst I was waiting for my friends who had just gone to the toilet, an overweight guy with glasses came over to me. "What is such a beautiful woman doing on her own?" Obviously, I just told him I was waiting for my friends. "Well I like your hair, and everything else". Then he walked off. I think that counts as a pull?

I'll leave you with this picture. Another possible reason we could be single. Such a stunner.

Bye xx

Rule No.5: Sometimes dieting is not sociably acceptable

It's 12.50am UK time, so I'm running late on this blog. The pub was far too tempting.

OK, so yesterday I said I was going to start dieting today...it started well, I had prawn salad for lunch. But, then I remembered we had a Fire Poi 'party' tonight, which basically consisted of alcohol and party food. There were doughnuts, crisps, chocolate and Pimms. Obviously refusing any of these would have just been morally wrong and extremely ungrateful. Therefore, I consumed a large bag of bacon rasher crisps, two doughnuts, two glasses of Pimms and two beers. I probably didn't need to be that keen, of course I was just trying to show how much I was enjoying the party. The diet starts tomorrow. Hopefully.

Tonight, my teacher whilst drunk and I think a little stoned told me I remind her of a Buddha. I'm presuming and HOPING this is because I'm pretty chilled and laid back. However, if I find out she meant I looked like a Buddha then I will probably have to kick her profusely next week, and of course whack her with my Buddha belly.

On a different note, BIC had a press event in our offices today and they had a caricaturist, so I obviously got mine done. I always knew my nose was big, my eyes were small and my cheeks were chubby, but there was no need for him to really emphasise it was there...I suppose he at least gave me big white shark teeth and a mouth like the Joker. Great.

I'm falling asleep as I type, so I'm sorry if I've just been talking crap. I'm going to attempt to sleep in this 100 degree room, where I already have sweat dripping off my face and I still have the window open. I'm hoping I don't wake up tomorrow cooked through like a spit roasted chicken. Minus the spit roast.

Night x