Rule No.71: Don't get a blow dry on a rainy day

I have been at my parents house in Coventry for nearly two hours now and I've already had two cups of tea and a whole shepherds pie made for me. This is the life. FYI, I didn't eat the whole pie as it was big enough for three people (although I wanted to).

My Dad has already given me the job of wrapping the presents he bought for my mum. It's my yearly task as apparently he can't wrap presents himself... However, I'm pretty sure this is a lie. Just like the time my brother told me 'I was the best at making cups of tea' so that I would feel special and actually want to make them. 

Anyway, a few things have happened in the past 24 hours...

I got my nails done last night and looked like Edward scissor hands. 

But now they look nice. 

I decided to get rid of the festive nails and go for a more grown up look...I am not five years old after all.

This morning Charlotte and I had a blow dry so we would look nice for the Christmas period. This obviously included the usual question from the hairdresser, "so where are your family from originally then? You're obviously not English".

I wonder if people will ever think I look English? I feel like my face just tells a massive lie. I am a walking (usually sitting) LIE. 

We then had a team breakfast, which included poached eggs on toast with maple bacon and avocado. It was heaven. I think I just dribbled again.

It was then time to do some work (bah humbug). However, I was actually quite productive considering it was Christmas Eve. I of course ensured we were listening to some 80s classics to keep us going. Don't hate me, but I'm bored of Christmas songs already...even Michael Buble ones.

After work I had a last minute trip to Fortnum and Mason to do some rather late Christmas present shopping. This basically included me pushing tourists out of the way whilst getting two items that I had pre planned to buy. I knew exactly where they were so I felt like I was doing some kind of game show challenge to get to them without physically pushing anyone over (or punching them). Luckily I survived. Oh, and the tourists survived too.

As I left the office to go to Euston station it started to bloody rain. Therefore, my blow dry was ruined. What a waste! At least my hair is now extra clean...

More annoyingly, I had so much stuff to take home I looked and felt like a sweaty donkey. 

I was supposed to be pulling a miserable face in this picture, but I actually look like I'm doing a Paris Hilton pout.

The photo doesn't really do the 'donkey look' much justice. However, I also had a bag on my back and my suitcase weighed more than me... The price I pay to give my family presents at Christmas (and most importantly bring enough clothes back so I have numerous outfits to choose from each day). 

I'm shortly going to the City Arms in Coventry. It's a yearly tradition to meet at the pub and I can't wait to see everyone (and drink). Although, I'm only going to stay out until midnight. The nights of going to the Colosseum (a Coventry club) after the City Arms and getting a kebab at 3am are over. You can never appreciate your Christmas dinner when you have a hangover and you're still full from a morning kebab...

I hope Santa visits you tonight chums. I know he's not visiting me until Boxing day, but you know, I'm not selfish so I hope you get lots of presents. Then you can hopefully share them with me. Thanks. 

X 

Rule No.40: Always take something to do on a train

I think I'm turning into a man.

I thought learning fire poi would make my arms more toned, but they just keep getting more and more muscley.

I am like the HULK.

Maybe I should be a wrestler.

I've also discovered that I'm pretty much a professional moth squatter now. The girls couldn't believe how quickly (and bravely) I killed a moth with my bare hand last night. They all roared with laughter. However, if they had seen my maggot infested kitchen last week then they would realise why I have such a hatred for moths. Say that, I should consider being the next Bear Grylls... 'Moth Grylls'? (as well as a wrestler). 

Last night I was at Lauren and George's house. They have just bought their first house together, which is VERY exciting. We spent the whole evening drinking gin, eating pizza, crisps and cookies. Then we played some hilarious games (although we did get quite competitive and moody at one point). I recommend everyone download the App 'Heads Up', it's so funny. Everyone has to act out the word on your phone, which you place on your forehead. Then it films everyone acting it out whilst you guess the word.

FYI, trying to act out a stingray is pretty hard...you end up looking like a skunk.

This morning I felt pretty fresh considering the amount of gin I consumed. Say that, I don't think I was totally with it as I managed to create a cloud of smoke in my parents kitchen. Although, I shouldn't take all the blame, it was also the toast's fault.

I had to throw it outside because it nearly caught on fire. Stupid thing. All it had to do is go a little bit brown and crispy. 

I'm currently sat on a train back to London. The train driver has announced that we are going to be stuck in Milton Keynes until the signal problems have been fixed (they've been broken for over two hours). I can't tell you how much this upsets me. I really wanted to get home early tonight so I could paint my nails and watch crap TV. 

I don't seem to have good luck with trains at the moment. I went to Birmingham yesterday with my guy mates and we ran and missed two trains.  How we managed to do that I do not know, but you're welcome to call us muppets (or something a bit harsher). 

Luckily I have something to do on this delayed train (apart from writing this blog). Shock, horror, I am SEWING. That's right boys I can sew buttons on to things. Not such a turn off now am I? 

Form an orderly queue please. 

Talking of men. A band from LA just started following me on Twitter. I couldn't help but notice they were very good looking. So I told them. Obviously. 

They favourited it, so it's not too weird...

Gina, also known as the PREDATOR. 

Goodbye 

X