Rule No.75: Hire someone to drag you to the gym

 It has begun.

I've started with Othello as apparently it's one of the easiest and most interesting ones... I have to say I felt pretty intelligent on the tube this morning. I was holding the book up like it was a sign for everyone to read, with the not so subliminal message "yes, that's right I'M READING SHAKESPEARE". I particularly waved it under the nose of a rather attractive guy.

In other news, I had a moment of fame the other night (kinda). Cosmo held Google Hangouts all last week for Clinique. Bridget March the online beauty editor for Cosmo had been discussing key fashion, beauty and nutrition trends and advice, and taking questions from real readers via a live Google Hangout. I was a standby reader just in case someone had Internet connection problems.

I was needed, hence my moment of fame. I enjoyed it, but watching it back I have realised that I don't have any eyes.

I need bigger eyes. 

I might get my eyelids removed. 

If you want to actually watch the video then click here and click on the fashion bit. 

Sometimes things aren't very obvious until you see them for yourself (like the image above) or until someone points them out to you. Like the time in secondary school when I was going to be Sandy in Grease. Then one day the show producer said "Gina, I've been thinking...since your voice is so low maybe you should be Danny?".

I had no idea people thought my voice was that low. This was made worse when I phoned a clients house phone a couple of years ago and the daughter answered, "Mummy, there's a woman on the phone, she sounds like a man".

Stop laughing.

I think I've managed to make my voice a bit higher over the past few years. I particularly make an effort to sound like a woman when I'm speaking to guy on the phone for the first time. When I'm hungover though it's a completely different story, even my best friends sometimes ask "Gina, is this you?" when they phone me.

I'm going to leave you with a quick summary of last weekend...

I organised a day out in London for my mum's 60th birthday, which was amazing. I highly recommend doing the backstage tour of the Royal Opera House. We also went for lunch at Sketch, which was incredible and they even did this for her:

On Saturday I went to the Planetarium in Greenwich. It was SO FUN and Greenwich is amazing. They have the BEST haloumi wraps in Greenwich market. After visiting the Planetarium I decided that I want to be an astronomer so I might buy a telescope (yes, another one of my 'New Year' hobbies...but at least I won't have to learn to play this one).

Please can someone buy me a telescope? A big one.

The rest of the weekend consisted of red wine, food, films and pubs. And I'm now writing this blog to avoid the gym. I need someone to start dragging me there. Literally. It's been SIX MONTHS.

Yes, you did just read that right. Six months.
. 

x

Rule No.74: Don't use the word 'stuff', unless you want to sound stupid

To add to the New Year's resolutions I wrote in my previous post, I have listed below seven things I want to make sure I do this year (I don't think these are the same as New Year's resolutions..?).  Anyway, here it goes: 

1) Go to the cinema (I haven't been since I went to see American Pie the Reunion in 2012)

2) Read at least three Shakespeare plays

3) Learn to understand Shakespeare

Just in case you're interested, the background to this Shakespeare situation is that I met an actor on Saturday night (fit, 6ft2, rather posh, might see again). He was telling me about some plays he has been in recently and I asked him "so do you understand this Shakespeare stuff then?". He laughed, but I suddenly realised how stupid I must have sounded. I've just never 'got' Shakespeare. I might have achieved an A in English Lit, but it's only because of Spark Notes. I couldn't even tell you what any of Shakespeare's plays are about. Except for Romeo and Juliet (obvs). Therefore, I want to read his plays and try to understand what he's talking about. I might even go to watch a couple.

I know, I'm confused too. What is happening to me? Why am I trying to become 'cultured'?

4) Learn to play the ukulele...it's still sitting in my wardrobe after my first attempt at playing it and after throwing a tantrum because it was too hard

5) Join a writing club...well I may as well and there could be potential husbands there

6) Join a film club (this will help with the cinema situation)

7) Start making YouTube videos for my blog 

I think this will be enough for now.

You'll be surprised to hear that I've already planned to go to the cinema tonight, and I joined a film club and a writing club last night. Therefore, I've pretty much done three of them already. Although, I need to actually go to these clubs, just joining doesn't really count.

In other news, there's been another case of extinction. Men have become dinosaurs once again. This time I think it's linked to Christmas. Even Scrooge doesn't like to be alone at Christmas. However, January is the start of the year, the start of new beginnings where guys want to be free to do whatever they want. Is this right guys? I'm just guessing here.

This case of extinction has happened to four people I know in the past week. Whether they had been on one date or six, over Christmas they had been speaking to the guy everyday. Then as the clocks stroke 12 on the 31st of December the extinction begun, soon all males were turning into dinosaurs. 

It's OK if this has happened to you. You're not alone. Plus, I was one of them.

I'm going to call these the Knobowankersaurus Rex.

Right before I go, I will leave you with some weird food.

Exhibit A:

How can you even call this steak? It's like hard vegetable pâté.

Exhibit B:

I just don't even know where to start with these.

Bye x