Rule No.69: Don't ever wear a jumper without jeans

It's nearly Christmas!

I have three more days of work left, then it's officially time to drink Baileys for breakfast (and see my family). Although, I spoke to my parents earlier today and was told two HORRENDOUS things:

1) We're not opening presents on Christmas day as we're going to wait for my brother and his family to arrive on Boxing Day
2) I don't have any presents

That's right. My Dad said, "well you haven't got any presents to open anyway". This is because my parents gave me money towards a chest of drawers for my bedroom, so now I don't have any presents.

When did being an adult become so rubbish?

Can someone please buy me a present?

I had my work Christmas party on Tuesday, which started with a civilised meal at Whyte and Brown and ended with seven of us going to Lucky Voice for karaoke. This resulted in me 'singing' Lion King songs with Prosecco spilt down my top, whilst wearing a green wig. 

Apart from our terrible singing, one other key thing I remember from the evening is the waiters comment at dinner when he gave me my food... 'oh yes, you do look like a sausage and mash type of girl'. Yes, that's right he actually said that. I nearly threw the sausage at him, but I didn't want to waste the sausage. 

I'm not sure if I was over tired or still drunk, but the next day I made a massive fashion faux pas. For some strange reason I didn't think to wear jeans with my jumper. In my bedroom mirror the jumper looked like a reasonable length. However, as soon as I started walking to the tube station it became rather short. Luckily I had my long beige coat to cover it up. However, I felt like a stripper on the tube. I was trying to keep my coat completely closed so no one could see my thighs. I was too scared to even sit down.

I'm going to break up this text with a mug shot.

                                                                                                             

Monday night I went for dinner with a guy (yes that's right an actual male).  It was raining, but he had a big umbrella (no this is not a euphemism) so there wasn't any need for me to use mine. Therefore, when we left the restaurant it didn't occur to me that I'd left my umbrella at the table. Well, until I had to walk home from the tube station and get completely soaked.

I called the restaurant the next day and they had my umbrella!

The story gets better, I promise.

I went to pick my umbrella up last night, but the waitress couldn't find it. I was obviously fine about it because at the end of the day it was just a £9 umbrella. However, the waitress told the manager and he felt bad so he gave me a £25 voucher to use at the restaurant!!!

I then thought I'd check to see whether I had actually left it in the bar we had gone to afterwards...

The barman went to search the lost property and brought back an umbrella that looked just like mine. I screamed "Yes, that's mine!". Walked out, and halfway down the street realised it wasn't mine. I know at this point I should have gone back and returned it, but it had started to rain and I needed it.

Therefore, despite me accidentally stealing someones umbrella, I have actually done very well here.

Go me!

Night x